Yearning to Crossdress: Understanding Your Irresistible Urges
The Longing to Crossdress
Many people I know who are not part of the crossdressing (CD) community struggle to understand CDs, our objectives, and our motivations.
Perhaps, though, that’s not so surprising if you sit down and carefully think about our community as a whole—what we do, who we are. Then ask yourself: Why is it they don't understand us?
Well, in my opinion, mainly because many of us don’t really understand ourselves!
Let’s Ask “Why?”
If I took a “straw poll” of, say, 20 Crossdressers and asked them, "Why do you crossdress?" I’d probably get close to twenty different, quite diverse answers. Almost certainly, quite a few would simply answer, “Hmm, good question… I don’t really know.”
So, if I took this a stage further and asked, “Why do you think you sometimes have an overpowering, all encompassing need to crossdress, something which is so strong, irresistible and almost overwhelming, that everything else your life becomes quite secondary? And then at other times, such need is not there at all, even if you wanted it to be?”
In short, why do you sometimes yearn, long, pine, almost beg to crossdress and, at other times, almost recoil from the thought of putting on a slinky En Femme dress, female underwear, or stockings?
Is It a Cycle?
Now, I’m not a medical person but it seems to me from my various discussions and debates with other T people that, just as women have their 28 day cycles of raging and then passive hormones, mood swings and changing temperament, the male of the species also has a cycle of his own.
Yet, with a genetic male, the cycle seems to be less regular, although most friends or colleagues of mine admit to having have good weeks and bad, good moods and not so good. Sometimes it's related to things that have happened in their daily lives, maybe at work or at home and sometimes it's related to their stress levels and inability to relax when they need to most. But there's a cycle nonetheless.
Intensity of Our Yearnings
Often, for a male, at times of major stress or, maybe after an enforced, prolonged period of not cross dressing, the need to don a dress, wig, or undergarments becomes so intense, so strong—and the yearning to escape into our feminine world is all we can think about.
Conversely, for some I have spoken with, a period of not wanting to crossdress can last from a few days or even a few months, almost as if the “need” simply lies dormant. But when the yearning comes back, watch out! Nothing can get in your way of getting into female attire.
Dealing with Our Feelings
From my own experiences, two noticeable things have happened to me with the effluxion of time. Firstly, in my earlier days during the times of an enforced absence from crossdressing, if I saw an opportunity coming up when I could crossdress—whether this might have been a week or even two weeks away—I would become quite preoccupied and all my thoughts and energies would be focussed on the time when I could dress again.
Honestly, at such times, my yearnings totally enveloped me. Nothing else mattered.
Secondly, as I have “matured”, the yearnings have diminished. While they're still there, I now have more opportunities to dress, which makes the feeling of need less severe. Although, to be fair, maybe this is partly due to the fact that I am almost full time now!
Lifelong Gift
Whatever the reasons, and no matter how strong the yearnings you may have to crossdress feel, rest assured they will never go away. They’ll be with you for life!
So, go on! Give in to temptation! Why not buy a new dress and go out next week?
I love to crossdress and I always enjoy the feeling of womens clothes every thing that is, the clothing, underwhere, heels and I always wanted to be a woman. Maybe I'm stuck in a man's body but I love to be a woman and enjoy the effect of crossdressing outside I am even taking hormones pills to delevop breast I love it very much John aka Janie
Like so many others, I’ve been crossdressing on and off all of my life. If there is one thing about me is that I NEVER recoil from the urge to crossdress, in fact, much the opposite, I dress whenever I get the opportunity even if it’s only for a couple of hours to enjoy a glass of wine and the sensations of being a woman. Given the opportunity I’d be Patricia 24/7/365. Despite the limitations imposed by my life, I take every opportunity I can to be Patricia.
Being a woman is enjoyable and invigorating for me. Crossdressing also allows me to relieve my stress and be the woman I am inside. As Patricia, I love being able to dress in any style I desire. When I go out I love the thought of being seen and checked out and hopefully being seen as attractive and sexy, if not desirable.
These are feelings I enjoy and don’t want to give up.
Kathy, your observation that at "times, my yearnings totally enveloped me. Nothing else mattered," tells a lot of the story. Obviously, those of us born into male bodies carry a certain amount of male hormones, or we would already have been genetic women. On the other hand, the fact that these urges come and have been with many of us for all of our lives shows that they are more than the result of a choice or the product of whimsy, and that at times the female hormones and feminine psychology win the upper hand. Furthermore, speaking not only for myself, I'm sure, I cannot find a purely rational explanation for the sense of balance and harmony that overcomes me when I don feminine garments—other than that it is right. The "woman inside" will not stay caged forever. :)
With a hug and a peck on the cheek to all,
Sylvia
I was forced by my older brother to wear my sisters panties when I was 8. I went to the Army, got married right after I got out, for 31 years. I have two very bright beautiful children and 3 grandchildren, My wife died 10 years ago and right after I started buying panties, then a skirt or a blouse, and now I have a full blown wardrobe.. I have a very physical job with lots of hours. I live in a very small community that will never accept crossdressing, so I do so in the privacy of my home. I love coming home from a hard day and dressing.. when I have time I will doll up completely, with makeup, nails, eyelashes,etc. I find it so much easier to do housework dressed femm than masculine. To me it is a great stress reliever. I have tried to find other cd around here to talk to about feelings, but it is such an uptight community that no one evens wants to talk, though they will admit they dress also.
i started at 12 years old wearing sisters bras and panties they felt oh so good!!!!!!!! and it was new and exciting then the thought of getting caught or knowing iwas getting away with it was a huge turn on!needless to say that over the years that feeling has subsided to a degree age has a way of doing that lol! but the desire to crossdress has never left me. ALWAYS liked the feel of silky panties on my butt.giggles and so many pretty styles of bras and panties to choose from to i own more bras and panties than most real women do at last count about 50 bras and 100 pair of panties*blush* i cant get enough now i am developing breast as well to fill out my bras i am up to a large b cup now and size 5-6 panties . i have my times where i do not dress up but i am always wearing panties at the very least!!! i only have 3 pairs of mens underwear lol!!!!!!!! i am not faced with a big decision as to weather i want to transition or not big decision not to be made hastily! i am using homeopathic estrogen and progesterone now started about a month ago. i thinking i am building up to the transition stage.will keep yall posted
hugs n kisses
Vanessa
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