How do crossdressers and trans girls choose their femme name?

Choosing your New CD Femme Name 

 

Furrow your brow and think back carefully… just how did you get your femme name? And did you pick a femme name from the very first day you started cross dressing… or was your name something which just sort of came along or appeared some time later?

I must say that this is quite a fascinating subject, especially as many of us can’t really answer the question—indeed, most seem to say that their femme name just appeared…. and just felt right for them. Most names come from our sub-conscious, possibly very much like the first appearance of our inner female self: we don’t know where she came from or why she suddenly appeared—but once she was here, we had this innate feeling that she was here to stay, that she would be part of us forever!

In many ways, we are lucky that we are able to choose our femme names, whereas genetic women are at the likes, whims (or mercy) of their parents who often deliberate for ages to think about and select a name for their daughters. This freedom of choice gives us unlimited scope to choose whatever name we wish, and can go for a modern day name or one from the annals of time.  

Yet some of us are almost pre-ordained to have the names we choose and I feel quite sure there is a deeper side to femme names that can be explored ad infinitum; just why did we pick that name we choose, why did we need to label ourselves so; or why do we need to have a femme name at all—is it a tacit admission that there really are two souls or spirits within our one body? That we really are two people in one? Generally, it appears that many girls do not seem to pay as much attention to picking their last or surnames, which is not that surprising, as many girls only use and know others by their first names. 

But, back to the main question. From talking with a number of crossdressers and trans girls, the most common ways in which they derived their first femme names include the following:

  • Some girls simply make an extension to their male name, for example: Martin to Martina, Justin to Justine or Eric to Erica;
  • Some make subtle or single letter changes: Francis to Frances, Robin to Robyn or Tracy to Tracey; or they pick a name that has similar sound qualities to their male name: Bill to Lil; Harry to Marie or Keith to Cathy;
  • Others adopt names that are the same for both males and female and stay with the name they already have been given: say, Kim or Evelyn or Chris;
  • A number of crossdressers select their femme name by choosing the name of someone they may know who is related to them, now or from the past, such as an aunt, a former teacher or a school colleague—someone who may have exuded womanhood in the style and manner our crossdresser aspires to;
  • The selected name is the same as someone our CD/trans girl admires and looks up to, whether it be a celebrity or a famous sports person or singer;
  • The femme name was suggested by someone else; or, finally:
  • The right name just sort-of popped up into our conscious and stayed there; without us having to think about picking a femme name—and the name just seemed appropriate

I believe I fit into this last category… my femme name just, how can I say, appeared and became a part of me without me ever consciously realising it…

We also, as you would expect, have girls who feel the need to have more than one first name or hyphenate their name(s) (and why not, we are free to choose!). They choose names such: Christine Jane Jones or Kate Jennifer Smith or Tiffany Lori Johnson or Mary-Jane Wilson or Trixi-belle Angel…. and so on… 

Finally, of course there are those CD’s or trans girls who deliberate at length, choosing and discarding names, then choosing and discarding all over again— choosing several different names over a period of time until they find the one which they feel fits them best.

Whichever way you found your name, don’t ever forget that it is she (the one within) who makes the choice so don’t be too puzzled or perplexed about why your femme name is Emily or Julie or Amber or Snowdrop—as long as your inner lady is happy, roll with it!

So, how about you, where did your femme name come from? Comment in the comments section!


80 comments


  • Amyrakunejo

    As I've come to remember who I truly am, the horror of realizing that I'm a prisoner inside mortal flesh, among other unspeakables of the societal misconduct variety, I remember the name I was given long before I was imprisoned in this mortal flesh and put to sleep.

    Amyrakunejo. In my native tongue, the name is a combination of two very simple, yet powerful things, though by themselves, the words have very little in contextual prose since my native tongue has very few single syllable responses to anything.

    Amira/Amyra (the spelling is less important than the pronunciation which has no noticeable difference), which means 'of fairness', but outside of as a name, has at least seven other meaning depending on the underlying context.

    Kunejo (this part often will have different syllables depending on context and the name prefix if there is one), this means 'lady', or 'femme', though the latter is usually used as a stage name for an actress.

    To say my name means 'Fairest Lady' is not necessarily fully accurate, but it does describe me a great deal, because I am very honest and very fair, but the perception of fairness being equated with being nice is often incorrect, and this shows in my true nature.

    Thing is, all that aside, most people calling out to me don't shout 'Amyrakunejo! Amyrakunejo! Osoidara karutenya!' (Amyrakunejo! Amyrakunejo! Please wait a bit!), more rather, people just call me 'Amy', which, to be fair, is a very unusual name in the context of my native tongue, but since it is a shortened version of Amyrakunejo, it's fine. Most people know my true name, and just shorten it for expedience sake.

    So, in my mortal flesh prison, the name I go by is Amy. I have a completely separated true mortal identity from my legal nonsense name (as an Anarchist I cannot stand that garbage and I want to scream whenever I hear it), and my true identity…well…

    Let us just say that some have compared me to that of the daughter of President Carter, though her name is spelled A-M-I-E. Also, my middle name isn't the same (I believe hers is 'Anna' but am not sure), and mine is Samantha. Why Samantha? Hmmm…

    Sounds good on a whisper, to be fair. I couldn't tell you much more, but again, this was a name I had chosen back before I was imprisoned in mortal flesh, so I'm really just reflecting back on my memories of when life was so much better, and when lovely ladies like everyone here were often my clients I did hair and makeup for (even if I was just a volunteer at Paulina's).

    I've not changed as a person since before my imprisonment, I just have a problem to deal with, that's all! I look forward to the next time I get to do the makeup and hair of one of you lovelies! I just hope you don't mind that I don't listen to pop music; that's Metallica playing in the background, or maybe it's SLAYER? Disturbed? Whichever it may be, it's METAL for sure, love.

    ♫There's a reason, to Give it All…♫
    (okay that's Rise Against)


  • Cassandra

    I'm one of the "girls" whose name just "appeared" to me a few years back. It just felt right and made me feel like the woman I know myself to be. I love it and have been using it on all my shopping trips online and in the Nursing Home I live in.


  • Jessica

    The article was interesting and contained a lot of truth. For me my first name just hit me one day while reading an article. The surname was a different story, I had a close friend and one day she just disappeared stopped writing me so I chose her last name of Smith, besides I figured it would make it harder for my ex to find me. The middle name had to be something where the initials would stand for something else. So I picked a name I liked so now my initials are JMS ( JUST MY SIZE )


  • William

    My female name is BillieJean and it was given to me by my uncle as a child and I have kept it for the longest time because I was born with both and my mom decided to have me as a boy but I always knew that I was a female


  • Susan

    My parents had made a vow to not name their children after anyone, they had names they did not like having been named for family friends. I am the eldest and they expected a girl and so did not come up with a male name. they had five names possible, when I was born the plumbing did not match any of the five. a year later my sister got two of those names, two years after that my other sister got another two. Susan was the one not yet used. At the time we my mother, father, or myself did not know the meaning of the name. I didn't even know when I started using it. But it is so appropriate for a Tgirl. It is a Hebrew derived name, it can mean wildflower, the lily of the field, Very close to the Aramaic word that Jesus of Nazareth used in Luke 12:27. A lot of people think of wildflowers as weeds, they don't care for transgendered women either. But Solomon in all his glory is not arrayed as beautiful.


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