How do crossdressers and trans girls choose their femme name?
Furrow your brow and think back carefully… just how did you get your femme name? And did you pick a femme name from the very first day you started cross dressing… or was your name something which just sort of came along or appeared some time later?
I must say that this is quite a fascinating subject, especially as many of us can’t really answer the question—indeed, most seem to say that their femme name just appeared…. and just felt right for them. Most names come from our sub-conscious, possibly very much like the first appearance of our inner female self: we don’t know where she came from or why she suddenly appeared—but once she was here, we had this innate feeling that she was here to stay, that she would be part of us forever!
In many ways, we are lucky that we are able to choose our femme names, whereas genetic women are at the likes, whims (or mercy) of their parents who often deliberate for ages to think about and select a name for their daughters. This freedom of choice gives us unlimited scope to choose whatever name we wish, and can go for a modern day name or one from the annals of time.
Yet some of us are almost pre-ordained to have the names we choose and I feel quite sure there is a deeper side to femme names that can be explored ad infinitum; just why did we pick that name we choose, why did we need to label ourselves so; or why do we need to have a femme name at all—is it a tacit admission that there really are two souls or spirits within our one body? That we really are two people in one? Generally, it appears that many girls do not seem to pay as much attention to picking their last or surnames, which is not that surprising, as many girls only use and know others by their first names.
But, back to the main question. From talking with a number of crossdressers and trans girls, the most common ways in which they derived their first femme names include the following:
- Some girls simply make an extension to their male name, for example: Martin to Martina, Justin to Justine or Eric to Erica;
- Some make subtle or single letter changes: Francis to Frances, Robin to Robyn or Tracy to Tracey; or they pick a name that has similar sound qualities to their male name: Bill to Lil; Harry to Marie or Keith to Cathy;
- Others adopt names that are the same for both males and female and stay with the name they already have been given: say, Kim or Evelyn or Chris;
- A number of crossdressers select their femme name by choosing the name of someone they may know who is related to them, now or from the past, such as an aunt, a former teacher or a school colleague—someone who may have exuded womanhood in the style and manner our crossdresser aspires to;
- The selected name is the same as someone our CD/trans girl admires and looks up to, whether it be a celebrity or a famous sports person or singer;
- The femme name was suggested by someone else; or, finally:
- The right name just sort-of popped up into our conscious and stayed there; without us having to think about picking a femme name—and the name just seemed appropriate
I believe I fit into this last category… my femme name just, how can I say, appeared and became a part of me without me ever consciously realising it…
We also, as you would expect, have girls who feel the need to have more than one first name or hyphenate their name(s) (and why not, we are free to choose!). They choose names such: Christine Jane Jones or Kate Jennifer Smith or Tiffany Lori Johnson or Mary-Jane Wilson or Trixi-belle Angel…. and so on…
Finally, of course there are those CD’s or trans girls who deliberate at length, choosing and discarding names, then choosing and discarding all over again— choosing several different names over a period of time until they find the one which they feel fits them best.
Whichever way you found your name, don’t ever forget that it is she (the one within) who makes the choice so don’t be too puzzled or perplexed about why your femme name is Emily or Julie or Amber or Snowdrop—as long as your inner lady is happy, roll with it!
So, how about you, where did your femme name come from? Comment in the comments section!
I chose to use my Mother-in-law's full name because she embodies everything that is feminine and womanly. She has always been my role model for being a woman and I always strive to be the wonderful human being and beautiful women that she is. I thank God everyday that she came into my life.
All the talk about choosing a femme name has prompted me to share my origins too! I’ve been cross dressing since about the age of 6 or so. I would try on my sister’s or mother’s clothes whenever I had the chance, as long as I was sure that I wouldn’t be discovered. Of course we “girls” all know that that idea is foolish because I think deep down we “want” to be discovered by our friends and relatives!
I continue to dress en femme throughout high school and college but using lingerie mostly. To this day I prefer to wear panties instead of male underwear since panties are less bulky and by far more prettier, even though men’s underwear is starting to match panties in color, texture, etc.
Back to the origin of my femme name. I’ve always liked my given second name of Stephen (spelled in the Scottish/Irish way) so changing it to the feminine form of Stephanie was easy. As for my last name, I took my given first name of Mark and converted it to Marcus simply because I’ve always liked that spelling of my given male name. Plus, when you combine the two names in the now en femme order of “Stephanie Marcus,” my femme name just rolls of the tongue in a glorious feminine linguistic way!
All the talk about choosing a femme name has prompted me to share my origins too! I’ve been cross dressing since about the age of 6 or so. I would try on my sister’s or mother’s clothes whenever I had the chance, as long as I was sure that I wouldn’t be discovered. Of course we “girls” all know that that idea is foolish because I think deep down we “want” to be discovered by our friends and relatives!
I continue to dress en femme throughout high school and college but using lingerie mostly. To this day I prefer to wear panties instead of male underwear since panties are less bulky and by far more prettier, even though men’s underwear is starting to match panties in color, texture, etc.
Back to the origin of my femme name. I’ve always liked my given second name of Stephen (spelled in the Scottish/Irish way) so changing it to the feminine form of Stephanie was easy. As for my last name, I took my given first name of Mark and converted it to Marcus simply because I’ve always liked that spelling of my given male name. Plus, when you combine the two names in the now en femme order of “Stephanie Marcus,” my femme name just rolls of the tongue in a glorious feminine linguistic way!
As with most aspects of my femininity I referred to my Latina culture. The name came from a young woman who worked for a few days in my office. When she was introduced to office staff, to my ears the name Angela Esparza sounded like a melody and it called to me. Much later I picked Isabel for my middle name. So my complete name became Angela Isabel Esparza. Now I'm considering changing my name to Isabel Inez Esparza. With either name there is no mistaking that I am Latina.
My name Mary Grace St. Claire just popped out when my therapist asked what is your name? I've always known myself as just Mary, so this was quite a surprise to hear my full name.
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