How do crossdressers and trans girls choose their femme name?

Choosing your New CD Femme Name 

 

Furrow your brow and think back carefully… just how did you get your femme name? And did you pick a femme name from the very first day you started cross dressing… or was your name something which just sort of came along or appeared some time later?

I must say that this is quite a fascinating subject, especially as many of us can’t really answer the question—indeed, most seem to say that their femme name just appeared…. and just felt right for them. Most names come from our sub-conscious, possibly very much like the first appearance of our inner female self: we don’t know where she came from or why she suddenly appeared—but once she was here, we had this innate feeling that she was here to stay, that she would be part of us forever!

In many ways, we are lucky that we are able to choose our femme names, whereas genetic women are at the likes, whims (or mercy) of their parents who often deliberate for ages to think about and select a name for their daughters. This freedom of choice gives us unlimited scope to choose whatever name we wish, and can go for a modern day name or one from the annals of time.  

Yet some of us are almost pre-ordained to have the names we choose and I feel quite sure there is a deeper side to femme names that can be explored ad infinitum; just why did we pick that name we choose, why did we need to label ourselves so; or why do we need to have a femme name at all—is it a tacit admission that there really are two souls or spirits within our one body? That we really are two people in one? Generally, it appears that many girls do not seem to pay as much attention to picking their last or surnames, which is not that surprising, as many girls only use and know others by their first names. 

But, back to the main question. From talking with a number of crossdressers and trans girls, the most common ways in which they derived their first femme names include the following:

  • Some girls simply make an extension to their male name, for example: Martin to Martina, Justin to Justine or Eric to Erica;
  • Some make subtle or single letter changes: Francis to Frances, Robin to Robyn or Tracy to Tracey; or they pick a name that has similar sound qualities to their male name: Bill to Lil; Harry to Marie or Keith to Cathy;
  • Others adopt names that are the same for both males and female and stay with the name they already have been given: say, Kim or Evelyn or Chris;
  • A number of crossdressers select their femme name by choosing the name of someone they may know who is related to them, now or from the past, such as an aunt, a former teacher or a school colleague—someone who may have exuded womanhood in the style and manner our crossdresser aspires to;
  • The selected name is the same as someone our CD/trans girl admires and looks up to, whether it be a celebrity or a famous sports person or singer;
  • The femme name was suggested by someone else; or, finally:
  • The right name just sort-of popped up into our conscious and stayed there; without us having to think about picking a femme name—and the name just seemed appropriate

I believe I fit into this last category… my femme name just, how can I say, appeared and became a part of me without me ever consciously realising it…

We also, as you would expect, have girls who feel the need to have more than one first name or hyphenate their name(s) (and why not, we are free to choose!). They choose names such: Christine Jane Jones or Kate Jennifer Smith or Tiffany Lori Johnson or Mary-Jane Wilson or Trixi-belle Angel…. and so on… 

Finally, of course there are those CD’s or trans girls who deliberate at length, choosing and discarding names, then choosing and discarding all over again— choosing several different names over a period of time until they find the one which they feel fits them best.

Whichever way you found your name, don’t ever forget that it is she (the one within) who makes the choice so don’t be too puzzled or perplexed about why your femme name is Emily or Julie or Amber or Snowdrop—as long as your inner lady is happy, roll with it!

So, how about you, where did your femme name come from? Comment in the comments section!


80 comments


  • Rei

    Mine was a combo of popped in my head and taken from another source. I love anime and I am very fond of Neon Genesis Evangelion. The one girl is named Rei and it means "lovely, bell" in Japanese. So it just clicked with me. The story of Rei is kind of sad as she is not a real person and she feels she is more of a doll than anything. But she is so nice and strong as well. I always felt connected to the character. And I am slowly coming out to more people (whats bizarre is that 98% knew or had a feeling I was Trans) and I love when they refer to me as Rei or "she" when talking about me to others. It's such a wonderful feeling to be accepted and loved as Rei. Being I'm 6'3 and my voice is unnaturally deep, its exhilarating to be seen and referred to as female.


  • Mary

    I chose Mary because it is close to my birth name. The biggest reason was because at my first regular job my boss was named Mary. I always admired her. Her beauty, her abilities, and her style.


  • Rachel

    My story is simple, which for about 25 years, I knew that I was supposed to be born female. That I should've been raised as a girl, but I wasn't. I spent most of my life writing stories and scripts with me as the the main character becoming a girl in every aspect. I had done a lot of research on a name of my true identity and I came up with a name. It came from one of my stories that I wrote, but it also derived from my studies of Japanese names. The name Reicheru Sakurai, which in Japanese means 'Rachel has the wisdom and beauty of a cherry blossom', which it was then decided that I call myself Rachel since I felt beautiful on both on the inside and out. It's who I was meant to be.


  • Vanessa

    A transgender lady friend who I chat with suggested Vanessa when i 1st started to open up about dressing like a woman. I thought about names close to my male name like Dana, Danielle, Dani. Vanessa just stuck in my mind.


  • Rebecca

    I don’t remember when I chose Rebecca but this name kept coming up in my mind at the beginning of my desire to dress as a woman. I tried different names but none fit me. Since my male birth name begins with an R, I picked between Rebecca and Robin and well Rebecca won haha. I’m glad that now I can associate myself as her, Rebecca Leon.


Leave a comment

Please note, comments must be approved before they are published