Are You a Clothes Collector?
I know for sure that I’m not alone in this.
As far as I can see, a very high percentage of crossdressers or people in the community seem to have the same issue (or is it a problem?) with clothes. First, we can’t resist buying new clothes—and once we buy clothes or accessories from En Femme, they are for keeps, they are forever, no matter whether we wear them once, twice… or never! In short, we never throw them away…unless we decide to purge which I’ve spoken about in a different article. Take a pause here and think carefully: are you like me, do you have a ratio of at least ten or more times (seriously) more female clothes, accessories, or shoes than male clothes or items? Does your female wardrobe make your collection of male clothes look miniscule by comparison?
By way of example, I have 2, maybe 3, pairs of male shoes, yet over 50 pairs of female shoes; 5 pairs of trousers, yet 60+ skirts; around 7 shirts, yet…, hmm.., well I’d better not say how many tops I have! If I took a photograph of the extensive wardrobe space she occupies versus the single-door compartment he has, I know where your sympathy will lie! Suffice to say, I think you get the picture. But maybe ownership of this extensive range of clothing is partly due to the fact that I never give any clothes anyway; never throw out any item of female clothing, shoes or accessories (well, unless the item is totally beyond use or repair, but that’s unusual). I guess some of this desire to hoard is genetic as my mother is a bit of a hoarder, but when I ponder the real reasons why? I can come up with several key excuses, sorry, legitimate reasons, why I like to hoard:
- In the early days of crossdressing it was necessary to surreptitiously buy female attire or underwear from real shops or markets (before the days of being able to go online and buy whatever you want from En Femme); secrecy was paramount and many purchases, especially of underwear, were rushed and embarrassing; there was simply no way one wanted to be revealed as a crossdresser to the shop staff.
- To be honest, many of the items I bought during such times have emotional value and I can fondly recall the times and trepidation and/or thrill of buying this dress or that underwear set. I may not ever wear such items again but that’s beside the point!
- A fair number of my female clothing items were bought on impulse (something which, when in male mode, I will never do: at such times, I am careful and rational to the extreme). I may have worn the article in question once or (oops, shouldn’t say this) never wear it at all. Actually, to be fair I’m not that bad but do have a few of these impulse clothing purchases still hanging in my wardrobe with the labels on; or shoes standing in the cupboard in their boxes, and which have never seen the light of day since I bought them. Yet, I sometimes look at these items and think I might, just might, one day wear them, either as is or with some adaption: so no point to throw them out!
- Then there are the dresses (maybe too long) or skirts (too short) or cardigans or tops which I no longer (temporarily, I hope) like or are no longer in fashion. I always think my views on what suits me may change or, as fashion is so cyclical, believe one day some of these items may come back into vogue. So why give them away?
- This one is hard to admit but, fundamentally, I don’t like to waste anything I have paid good money for; even if it doesn’t quite fit or look right on me, now and then I have good intentions of taking the dress or top or skirt to a capable seamstress and having it made shorter, smaller or the zip replaced… but when? Next week, next year, never… I’m not sure.
- So, as you can see, once I have bought that new dress or skirt from En Femme, it will be mine forever… whether I needed to buy it or not! In any event, whatever reason(s) we all find for collecting our lovely feminine clothes, could it be that buying (and hoarding) clothes far in excess of our needs is actually necessary to appease the dominant female persona who dwells within many of us? After all, she controls a large portion of the way we think and act in our everyday lives…
Does anyone have a better explanation?
My problem is pantyhose. I don’t care how torn up they are, it’s almost impossible for me to toss them. The few times I did toss a pair, I stayed up thinking about them all night only to dig them out of the trash and wash them the next day. Hell, if I see a pair abandoned on the side of the road, I feel compelled to rescue them and take them home. I just love them so much, especially the beige ones…
I have two closets in my bedroom; one male (work clothes) the other (my favorite ??) my off work dresses and blouses. I do dress enfemme for work, but always a button down shirt and dress pants; heeled boots ?? a must. Yes I do wear my bra and boobs. I’m not ashamed any longer about my feminine self. Can’t go out without hair, face and figure correct.
Having been a closeted CD off and on for as far back as I can remember I truly related to what you’ve written along with the other replies. I yearn to be free and accepted for who I am. Probably will never happen. One thing I know. No matter how often I quit and purge, the irresistible urge to shop, buy and wear always returns stronger and more uncontrollable each time. And each time is more exciting and thrilling. I just love being girlie! Hugs, Debbie
Hi Everyone,
I totally understand what your saying Kathe!! The male me wears the same t-shirts with my company logo along with my 3 or 4 pair of jeans. The male me owns one dress shirt and no dress pants. The female me has acquired 15 dresses, 30 or so skirts, 15 pairs of sexy shoes and a bunch of tops just in the last 3 – 4 months. The last time I purged I did not dress up for 23 years and this past fall of 2018 I decided to start dressing again. So I told my loving and supportive wife of 20 years about my past Cross dressing and I'm back. Personally, I have always felt very feminine inside and I'm sure if I pursued it, I would be a candidate for reassignment surgery. I have never been truly happy in my male body but I am happy presenting myself as a woman. So it's not hard to understand why I have collected so much female clothes in such a short period of time.
Also, I love the dresses and lingerie En Femme has, but a lot of the tops and skirts are too form fitting for me. I would Love to see some skirts and especially tops designed for us girls who have a more round figure. And I would Love to see a picture of Kathe! I have always wondered what she looks like!?
xoxo Brenda
Ah, this very subject crossed my mind just the other day – how prescient you are, Kathy! Over the past couple of years I have managed to purchase and so accumulate many beautiful and to my mind sexy panties and bras, stockings, pantyhose etc. etc., not so much outerwear, although this is gradually changing, as I become ever more confident in exploring and developing my real feminine self. But I am finding that my bedroom chest of drawers is getting fuller and fuller with panties, so much so that my male socks (which I do wear daily) are being crowded out, and I have now relegated my male underpants (so unsexy and I try not to wear them if I can) to a drawer below the bed. And I mustn't forget that I hang my ten+ bras separately in my bedroom closet rather than stuff them into the drawer where they will inevitably lose their shape. And then there are my blouses which are also hanging in the closet alongside my male dress shirts – as I write this there is still room for more acquisitions. But the question is: will I keep on buying? The short answer is probably 'yes' – there is a genuine thrill about making that purchase of lingerie or outerwear, and getting home to put them on and becoming the woman I dream of being. And will I dispose of anything I have bought, perhaps because it's not looking so fresh and sexy any more? Maybe so, maybe not. So then, no easy answers.
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